最不習慣還是天氣,過去一年都生活在陽光是稀有財的大陸上,
又燜又熱的天氣真的需要花時間重新適應。
最近想跟大家分享這篇: http://on.fb.me/1L8nFpM
這個女生是一件強暴案的受害者,
文中提到幾件事:
1.她曾經在超商中聽到一個媽媽教她的女兒不要穿得太過清涼,以免被侵犯
(原文:I feel so terrible for the little girl whose mother was teaching her at the grocery store that she deserved to be assaulted if she dressed comfortably for the weather)
媽媽這樣告訴她的女兒可以理解是出於保護心態,但是她卻間接告訴她的女兒:你不受他人侵犯的權利是Conditional的,這個女兒長大會怎麼想? 她會在無意中限制自己因為她不相信她可以盡情地做她想做的穿她想穿的。她也有可能變成指責受害者的那一群無知的人。
2. 她被強暴時穿著XXL的帽T跟運動褲(原文: I was not wearing this outfit when I was raped. I was wearing a size XXL hoodie and a pair of my mom’s sweatpants, much to the shock of the friend I told after, who asked what she’d been taught to ask: “What were you wearing?”. )
媽媽們,女兒穿得多就安全了嗎?
3.她呼籲: (原文:Stop perpetuating slut-shaming and thus perpetuating a culture
of excused rape. Stop perpetuating slut-shaming and thus perpetuating a culture of insecurity, inherent shame, and body image distortion which can cause an innumerable amount of incredibly dark issues nearly impossible to overcome.)
我們能做的是想清楚,there's no excuses for rape!
突然想聊這個是因為最近有相當程度的感同身受。
臺灣的夏天非常熱,所以一開始我相當不適應(well...need some time to readjust)
有時候直接穿著tank top 走在路上,卻感受到周圍一些不友善的眼光,
有趣的是:有男有女
男: 打量
女: 吃驚或不贊同的眼光
我媽有時也提醒我穿這樣出門不好,
我問她哪裡不好,她也說不出甚麼convincing的理由,我知道她是擔心我的安全。
但就像這個女孩說的: "My body is mine, and I love it. It is the house I live in... I refuse to be ashamed of it for any reason, especially the reason being that this culture which glorifies sex and punishes those who have it, which encourages being sexy and then preaches that sexy girls ask for attack."
回想起和日本女性友人的對話,
我知道無論男女,
有些人心中還是對於性侵害的被害者抱持"多多少少是他們咎由自取"的看法,
我無法贊同這樣的說法:
夏天穿著讓自己舒適的衣服是這麼基本的一件事,
社會的眼光和潛在的危險卻讓我們不敢自由選擇所想,
危險的是當我們覺得被害人有錯,同時就默認了加害者有理,
"Be the change you want to see",
在Nobel Peace Center看到這句話後就一直放在心裡,
希望有一天每個人都可以自由自在地做自己,
而這一天的到來就是從現在開始一點一滴小小的努力開始。
雖然不怎麼有氣質,但是最後這張圖說明了社會怪罪受害者邏輯背後的荒謬性。
一些潛在的爭端的議題大家避而不談,
我們都想當好人,卻不小心成了共犯。
